Is it time to start taking heteroflexibles more seriously? According to Nicole Legate, an assistant professor of psychology at the Illinois Institute of Technology, the answer is: Yes!
Legate is the co-author of a 2016 study that looked at people’s specific identities, behaviors, and attractions to gain a better understanding of sexual orientation as a whole.
She and co-author Ronald Rogge interviewed over 3,000 adults living in the U.S. over the course of roughly two years. What they concluded was that an additional sexual orientation category–heteroflexibles–should be added alongside heterosexuals, bisexuals, and homosexuals.
Urban Dictionary defines “heteroflexible” as:
How about we take this to the next level?
Our newsletter is like a refreshing cocktail (or mocktail) of LGBTQ+ entertainment and pop culture, served up with a side of eye-candy.
An in-between between bisexual and straight. A person who is mainly straight but does sometimes find the same gender appealing. Most of them could imagine having a homosexual relationship, but they mainly have heterosexual relationships.
It’s easy to bunch heteroflexibles in with bisexuals, but the Legate and Rogge found distinct differences between the two groups.
First, they observed that 56% of bisexuals reported having had a same sex partner in the last year, whereas for heteroflexibles that number was slightly lower, at 42%. They also found that heterosexuals had their own unique health issues.
“Against heterosexuals, they [heteroflexibles] showed higher rates of different kinds of risks and worse psychological functioning,” Legate tells the Chicago Tribune. “The risk behaviors they showed in our study were things like problematic drinking, condom-less sex–so greater levels of sexually transmitted infections.”
The Chicago Tribune reports:
Heteroflexibles are much less out about their orientation, according to Legate, so they don’t talk about it to other people nearly as much as bisexuals or gay and lesbian individuals. And not offering that bit of information to a health provider could prevent a physician, for instance, from recommending getting tested or talking about PrEP, pre-exposure prophylaxis, to prevent against HIV since same-sex partners (regardless of how one identifies) tend to have greater risk for sexually transmitted infections.
Based on her research, Legate estimates that up to 15% of the general population could identify as heteroflexible, but she says more data is needed to make a better determination.
One way to gather this information could be through doctors’ officers.
“When you go to the doctor’s office, they don’t ask you for your sexual orientation,” Legate says.
“I think educating providers about the fact that it’s OK to ask and that it is relevant in many cases just like knowing race and age — these are standard demographic questions that can give us a little extra health information or help us understand what groups may be at elevated risks for different things.”
Related: Why more straight guys are going to all-male jerk-off clubs
Don't forget to share:
Paco
It’s not “heteroflexible”. It’s still the same old closet. As many gay and bisexual people can attest to, the closet is a miserable place to be. So of course these “heteroflexibles” have a higher rate of health risks and psychological problems. I’m also pretty sure they are mostly evangelical and vote against LGBTQ equality every chance they get as well.
I don’t think creating a new label to allow them to continue having the benefits of straight status in society while undermining the rest of us is very helpful.
enlightenone
You said it best!
Donston
(lengthy post alert!)
The problem is it’s not a technical term. Outside of heterosexual, homosexual and sometimes bisexual, all the rest of these terminologies just reflect sociology, identity politics and how you wish to be perceived. I thought a lot of people now wanted to see “bisexual” as folks who can have romantic passions and relationship contentment beyond one sex? But if over 40% of “heteroflexible” identifying people are dating their same sex then aren’t they actually “bisexual”? It just feels like a decent amount of these people (particularly dudes) view “bi” as “too gay” for them. Furthermore, the study is very hetero-cenctric. What about a study on people who view themselves as “homoflexible”? I guess if you have unabashed same-sex preferences and ambitions then people assume you don’t have internal and sociological struggles or confusions. It just feels like too many people are going out of their way to promote hetero dynamics and hetero-normalcy among “queer” folks. I don’t like how when it comes to dudes and sexual and identity politics, so much much of it has become about guys trying to appease women or appeal to women, or trying to hold on to a sense of hetero-normalcy, or trying to make sure they’re not viewed as “too gay”, or trying to fit in with people who have unabashed non-homo preferences, ambitions and fulfillment. It’s been problematic, and it needs to stop.
Straight, gay, bi, fluid, pan, bi-curious, heteroflexible, homoflexible, queer, omnisexual, whatever. It ultimately is just the promotion of identity politics and trying to fit yourself into some niche. I will never be fully in the “I don’t believe in labels” camp. I understand how important identity is from a political and personal perspective. However, the identity dependence and the validation seeking is out of hand and needs to be confronted. Here are the list of things that will always make identity a complicated and muddled conceit: Individualism, politics, religion, ego, sociology, social media, money, the orientation spectrum, fluidity, experimentation, paraphilias, mental illness, trauma, narcissism, homophobia, trans-phobia, internalized phobias, hetero pressures, hetero privileges, non homo worship and superiority, a lack of consensus when it comes to the definition of words, and the introduction of new words. Things will never be as cut and dry and universal as some folks want it to be. So, how about we stop placing identity on such a high pedestal?
We need to be focused more on snuffing out homophobia and trans-phobia and effemi-phobia, understanding the realities of fluidity, understanding and accepting the gender, romantic, affection, sexual, emotional investment, relationship spectrum, and assisting people with their mental health struggles. We need to focus on creating a world where people can unabashedly be themselves. We need to make sure people can be real about their dimensions and struggles. We need to make sure people can be unabashed about who they want to date and love and have long-term relationships with. We don’t need anymore promotion of “labels”. We don’t need to be telling people they have to identify as this or that, or they have to hold on to some type of hetero image or homo image. It’s all become too problematic.
Heywood Jablowme
For once I agree with – and comprehend, lol – one of your very long posts.
I see this as progress. These are mostly young adult guys (since there’s much less stigma for women calling themselves bisexual) who think being gay is fine, who think being bisexual is fine, who are not anti-gay in any sense, who recognize homosexual impulses and desire in themselves and WANT to be able to act on their own homosexual impulses and desire.
In past eras they would have suppressed all this stuff, become gay-bashers, etc. etc. – we know the drill.
A generation ago the societal attitude was still: If a guy has sex with a guy even once, well he’s gay, case closed, that’s it. Not true! And certainly discourages experimentation.
The name “heteroflexible” may be annoying but the sexual continuum is still real – as you often tell us, Donston!
Donston
I just feel like too many people prioritize sociology, politics and how people perceive them. A lot of people don’t want to do the work to understand gender, sexuality and the orientation spectrum. They just want to stick an identity on something or fit into whatever sociological sphere. And too many dudes (even guys who are homosexual in every way) spend too much time focused on what women think of them and adhering to their rules and politics. These are the issues I’m having.
Cam
Just stop it. This site tried in 2016 to push the phony “Hetero-Flexible” label. And the excuse was “Well it might help self haters feel more comfortable coming out.
It’s just the same old bi erasure masquerading as something new. As for the author of the “Study”, that study was blown out of the water when it turned out that Nicole Legate just took people’s word for the behavior and didn’t do any actual research or study.
Summary: It’s just a label for bi or gay guys who don’t want to be called bi or gay.
Donston
I’m not here to tell people they need to identify as whatever, otherwise, they’re not considered “out”. There will always be non heterosexuals who present themselves as “straight”. There’s homosexuals who refuse to connect themselves to “gay”. There’s non homosexuals who do present themselves as “gay”. Fluidity is a real experience for some. And the romantic, sexual, affection, emotional, relationship spectrum can be complicated and individual. We should be pushing for people to be more honest and free and to not be so driven by ego and sociology. Identity above all else is not the answer.
Heywood Jablowme
You seem to think the term “bisexual” is so time-honored, so traditional, so scientifically defined, that we can’t possibly mess with it. Hardly! If someone is bisexual does that mean he’s 50% or 40% or X% same-sex attracted? Who decides – you?
And I know you’ve heard this before: WTF do YOU care what people call themselves, anyway? Why does it matter so much to you? I can see you going to the Canadian territory of Nunavut and you tell all the Inuits: “Hey, I’m going to call you people Eskimos. I’m just used to it, dammit, and it’s the same damn thing! This is Eskimo erasure!”
Also, it’s pretty similar to you calling yourself Cam when for awhile there you were calling yourself DC Guy. 🙂
scottjamesmiller
We’re NOT adding more letters and we’re not changing the flag.
Kangol2
Who is this “we” you speak of? Who elected you leader?
C_Alan
“Heteroflexible” is the slightly less closeted version of “on the down low”. That said maybe it’s evolutionary. Let’s see where this goes. We aren’t any worse off.
Josh447
Just stick with the Kinsey scale and all will be well.
G'0Yveh
It’s a variant of “g0y” identification (spelled w. a zer0) by men who have never heard of “g0ys”.
MrMichaelJ
It’s a spectrum people. Sorry, but if you’re going to discount every straight guy who can get turned on by another guy as “totally bisexual” or some “closet case” then that’s just pathetic. This whole “15%” are flexible and 3% are gay is also laughable. The percentage of “not 100% straight” seems to be about 80% if not more. Odd how there are so many heterosexual guys yet the ‘money shot’ in straight porn have absolutely nothing to do with women.
Donston
80% is likely a wild overestimation. Not everyone is bi. Not everyone experiences fluidity. Not everyone is “a lil bit gay”. Just because something is common doesn’t make it “almost everyone”. Preaching those types of falsities just enhances manipulation, the pressure to stay closeted, hetero pressures, shame towards homosexuality, shame towards homo preferences and ambitions, and straight/hetero-leaning worship and superiority. In general, we just need to stop being so damn sex obsessed. And we need to stop depending on sex for identities. Men’s egos in particular are so driven by who they can attract, what their sexual attractions are and who they can bed. There are men out there who perhaps have more persistent sexual attractions towards women but are homo-leaning when it comes to the romantic, affections, emotional investment, relationship contentment parts of the spectrum. Yet, because they’re so caught up in having some type of attractions and sexual enjoyment towards women they refuse to embrace the other parts of their orientation and be real with people about them. While sexuality by itself can be complicated. The goal is for people to understand and accept the entirety of the spectrum. That is what allows people to understand themselves more and become less driven by social validation and expectation and identity politics. Identities often don’t get people to that kind of place.