The gays live where we thought they did. The once-in-a-decade census that captures LGBTQ+ couples shows gay men tend to settle in large metropolitan areas, whereas gay women are more likely to be concentrated in rural outposts and college towns.

The Associated Press reported the Census’ findings, which were compiled in 2020. Los Angeles County, the most populous in the U.S. with more than 10 million residents, contains the largest number of both types of same-sex couples. As expected, all of the counties with the largest numbers of gay couples have large populations.

But there are notable differences. The county that encompasses New York City, which has more than 8.3 million residents, is home to the second-largest number of male-male couple households. But NYC doesn’t show up on the list for women. Instead, Maricopa, Arizona, home to Phoenix and nearly all of the desert state’s sprawling urban areas, occupies the No. 2 spot. (Cook County, home to Chicago, is No. 3 on both lists.)

When one looks at the counties with the largest share of same-sex couples, cultural stereotypes become more prevalent. San Francisco tops the list for men (5.9%), followed by Washington D.C., New York, Boston and St. Louis.

For women, the largest share of gay couple households can be found in Hampshire, Massachusetts (3.9%), a bucolic county close to the Berkshires, and home to multiple universities and theaters. Hampshire’s neighboring county, Franklin, is No. 4. Counties that are home to Portland, Oregon; Richmond, Virginia; and Baltimore are also in the top five.

The disparities between the two genders continue from five onwards, with counties that are home to Atlanta and Fort Lauderdale/Wilton Manors hosting large shares of gay male couples; whereas counties that are home to Cornell University and Ithaca College in New York and Asheville, North Carolina host some of the largest shares of lesbian couples.

Crissi Dalfonzo, director of the Center for LGBT Education, Outreach and Services at Ithaca College, says the numbers support the generalizations about gay men preferring cultural urban enclaves, and lesbians preferring a more outdoorsy lifestyle.

“Stereotypes often exist for a reason, but they can be problematic because they can take away the individuality,” she told the AP.

Related*

Notably, cultural stereotypes about queer folx were present last year when Spotify released Spotify Wrapped, the platform’s annual overview of users’ listening habits. LGBTQ+ people were largely placed in three cities: Burlington, Vermont; Berkeley, California; and Cambridge, Massachusetts.

A spokesperson for Spotify told the New York Times there were 1,300 Sound Town locations for the app’s 574 million users. Of them, .6% were assigned to Burlington… and seemingly all of them were queer!

It makes sense that queer people would gather in cosmopolitan areas and educated enclaves centered around the arts. Oftentimes, those are the communities most supportive of queer rights.

With that said, cultural preferences don’t always tell the whole story. There are socioeconomic factors, too. The phrase “DINK” (double income, no kids) came from somewhere!

The median household income for male-male couples in the U.S. is $127,900, compared to $74,580 overall. Large cities with vibrant gay communities, such as San Francisco and New York, are the most expensive places to live in the country.

The cost of living in more rural areas such as Western Massachusetts or Upstate New York, home to the largest shares of lesbian households, is significantly less.

“In general, large urban settings are more expensive and less child-friendly than suburban and rural areas,” Gary Gates, a retired UCLA demographer told the AP. “As such, it makes sense that female couples would opt for less urban locales.”

But history and cultural attitudes may play the biggest role of all. The large U.S. metros with vibrant gayborhoods–LA, New York, San Francisco, D.C., Wilton Manors–also house large shares of gay couples. Conversely, areas such as Hampshire, Massachusetts and Asheville, North Carolina are education hubs, where lesbian students are known to settle down after their studies.

Of course, demographic data on LGBTQ+ people is still in its infancy. The Census only added “same sex” and “opposite sex” to its relationship categories within the past 10 years, and the Census Bureau only counts registered residents.

As more years pass, we should receive continued clarity about the living habits of LGBTQ+ people. But so far, the survey says… we are kind of predictable!

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