Jarrod Lee came out and found his purpose. Finally unburdened of his secret, he felt lighter than ever before, and ready to approach life with newfound confidence and determination. The transformative experience led Lee to personal nirvana, which is where he underwent his epiphany.

“What if he could help make other gay men feel this good, too?”

Lee started the The Daring Academy, an ever-present support group of gay men who coach each other through body-shame and other feelings of inadequacy. With a background in psychology, Lee believes the body and mind are always in-sync.

A healthy mind leads to a healthy body, and vice versa.

“I was closeted from my dad for a good chunk of my life. I was embarrassed about it, scared about coming out. I hid a lot of myself,” Lee said. “But 2020 completely changed things for me. I came out to my dad. I just dug deeper. I had a lot of trauma, there’s all this stuff. Then I thought, ‘OK, I don’t just want to train people with their bodies anymore. I want to help people with their mental health, and really just build confidence inside and out.”

Today, The Daring Academy has roughly 100 members, all of whom Lee supports however he can. Some may need a therapeutic Zoom session, while others may want a supportive voice memo before a first date. As a digital nomad himself, Lee coaches gay men all over the world… from the U.S. to Dubai.

In his previous life as an unhappy accountant, Lee tried all of the crash diets and fitness trends. But his progress was always temporary. He says that’s because he lacked self-love and support. Evolution can’t happen without them.

Queerty recently caught up with Lee to chat about the keys to transformation, life as a nomad and his wonderful husband. Here’s what he had to say…

QUEERTY: You seem passionate about what you do! What prompted you to get into coaching?

JARROD LEE: Beforehand, I was an accountant. I hated accounting. I absolutely detested it! I was good with numbers, but didn’t like it. But because I was spending so much time, I wanted to get fitter, healthier and stronger. It made such an impact on me, my confidence and mental health, all of the above, I thought “Hey, instead doing this thing that I’m dreading all the time, what if I could help change someone’s life, and make an impact on someone?” This is over 10 years ago now.

I know all of the stuff. We’re really going deep. It’s not just, “Hey, here’s your body.” It’s, “This is my dating life. I want to improve on this, I’m struggling here. I’m losing confidence in my career here.” We do the whole shabang. We have this thing called re-imaging. I’ve noticed the main thing that keeps people stuck isn’t so much “Hey, here’s a workout plan. Here’s a diet plan.” You can get there anywhere online. It’s all over the place. The main thing I help guys with is, seeing themselves differently. Maybe they’ve always seen themselves as someone who hates exercise. It’s, “OK, how can we turn you into someone who sees yourself and enjoys it?”

You look great and have a great body. What do you say to guys who may be intimidated by that?

I love this question! Number one, people who are happy and confident, they will never judge you. If you go into the gym and someone judges you, that’s a really small percentage. Most people are so busy minding their own business. They don’t care. Secondly, some people cheer you on, and want you to crush it and succeed. But I tell people this all the time: Make your own decision of what you want to create. You don’t have to get abs. If you want to lose 10 pounds, that’s awesome. There’s no right or wrong way. I feel it’s important to be super clear about what you want. Not to please anyone, people on Grindr, Tinder, dating partners, friends. Just please yourself. Secondly, surround yourself with people who believe in you and want you to succeed. When you have those people in your corner, it doesn’t matter. I know that feeling. You think people are judging you, it’s intimidating. But if you are super focused on what you want to create, you get the right people around you, shove everything else out.

How do you get to the gym when you really don’t want to?

Some days, I don’t want to! When you do it enough times, it almost becomes a habit where it’s just an instinct. In the beginning, this is where getting the right people around you is super crucial. If you’ve got a partner or friends, and they don’t want you and they just skip it, then you also skip it. I’ve done that. If you’ve got the wrong accountability buddy, they will pull you away. But if you’ve got somebody who’s like, “Hey, just go.” You do that enough times, it becomes ingrained in you.

You’re also a digital nomad. That’s so cool! But what’s the most challenging aspect?

It’s a luck of the draw with Air Bnbs. But the constant change. Twelve-hour differences. We went from Toronto, Denver, to now Europe. Sometimes I don’t know what time, or what day it is. And new places. It’s exciting, but every new place you have to find out where the supermarket is. You need to learn the whole thing. And because we move month to month, it’s learning really fast. That can be a challenge. It can be fun, but also challenging.

What are some favorite places you’ve been?

Prague is high up there. But I loved Hoian in Vietnam. They do these floating lanterns, there are lights in the sky. It’s beautiful!

How do you keep a fitness routine while moving around so much?

Strength training is my foundation. We sign up for a gym every place we go. If we don’t, I make do with home workouts. But a lot of my clients, they’re business owners and travel for work. If you just know the principles of you bodies work, the physiology, all of that.

You and your husband look so cute together! How did you meet?

We met on Tinder. Funny story. When I left for New Zealand, I told myself I had this funny feeling that I was going to meet my future husband, who’s going to be British. Random thought, just popped into my head. Within the last month or so, I was like “Yeah… this is probably not gonna happen.” But the funny thing was, he’s from Slovakia, so I was half right. He’s from Slovakia, he’s not British. But since, he’s gotten his British passport. So now I do have a British partner. It was a random thought! 

I think we call that manifesting! What do you like to do together?

We love seeing new places. We play a lot of board games. We love board games with friends. He’s a big fan of reading books, fictional. We love exploring places. This is part of our travels, seeing new things together. Our dates are often mini golf, or going to arcades and amusement parks. I’m quite adventurous, so I’ll see things, and he’ll come along. He’s more on the introverted side, so he’ll take me to the quieter things. It’s a good balance.

You’re a trainer, so we have to ask… What’s the most attractive part of the male physique?

Oh wow. It’s changed over the years! It used to probably be chest. Then it became arms. But maybe now it’s glutes. It changes.

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