The month is halfway over? Ju-lying!
(OK, forgive the cheesy pun. The high-temps, AC droplets, and constant scrolling are finally getting to us.)
If you’re equally brain-fogged, here’s a rundown of this week’s biggest LGBTQ+ stories: Jonathan Bennett unveiled his Christmas plans, Kit Connor is potentially joining the Marvel Cinematic Universe, and Madonna restarted work on her biopic.
How about we take this to the next level?
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Plus, Kamala Harris hopped on the remix, Joel Kim Booster debuted a body-filled photoshoot, Alan Cumming made a Taylor Swift admission, and we bid an emotional goodbye on Netflix’s The Boyfriend.
But that’s just half the story! Otherwise, we’re blasting throwback bops, snagging summer fits, thirsting over Joe Jonas, and maybe even learning a TikTok dance?!
Turn the AC way up and put the work down! These are the 10 things we’re obsessed with this week…
1. Matt Rogers getting nasty
Fire Island star and Las Culturistas host Matt Rogers is not only hilarious, well-versed in pop culture, and adorable. He’s also apparently nasty? Cue the Janet Jackson!
As if my proverbial crush on Rogers could get any bigger, he just modeled the new collection from infamously naughty brand Nasty Pig. In the spread, he sports pieces like the Adonis Thong ($29), Coach Polo ($79), Coach Trunk Shorts ($69) and gives some serious Challengers vibes. Can Luca green light a sequel, like, stat?
2. Sniffies Beach Cruiser Collection
Only Sniffies could come up with the hottest (and lewdest) summer collection I’ve ever seen. The map-based app — which is famously unafraid of a good time — debuted its very own Vintage Striped and Tiger Speedos ($89 each). Both options even have “Sniffies” slyly printed on the booty, in case you’re hunting IRL.
Still, I’m personally gagged by their C*mdump and Bukkake beach towels ($69). Featuring illustrations by Jacob Pyne — better known as C*mpug — they’re just as raunchy, fun, and explicit as the names suggest. Their extra-large size provides room for two, but you’ll want to tuck them away at the family pool party.
3. NBC’s Smash finally hits streaming
The theater gays’ prayers were answered! As of this week, NBC’s cult musical-theater series is streaming on Peacock.
For the culturally inept, Smash was a short-lived dramedy set on the Great White Way. The 2012 fave followed a cast of gay icons — including Debra Messing, Christian Borle, Anjelica Huston, and Megan Hilty — as they attempted to mount a musical based on Marilyn Monroe’s life. Also, noted Republican Katharine McPhee was there. The best part, however, was always its impeccable soundtrack. (“Let Me Be Your Star,” anyone?)
If you haven’t yet watched, be forewarned: you will fall in love, binge, and get stuck waiting for the long-promised and oft-delayed IRL Bombshell musical.
4. Cheap sunglasses (and a backup pair)
Summer is far from over, and I’ve already lost a whopping two pairs of specs. For that reason alone, I’ve decided to adopt the mantra of ’70s rock band (and low-key bears), ZZ Top: “Go get yourself some cheap sunglasses!”
If you’re anything like me, I recommend the KALIYADI Polarized Sunglasses. Not only are they affordable — a variety of colors start at $17.99 on Amazon — they come in packs of two! You know, for when I inevitably lose another.
5. Little Debbie Park
I was today-years-old when I learned there’s a Little Debbie Park, featuring larger-than-life-sized sculptures of confections like cosmic brownies, oatmeal cookies, and Christmas tree cakes. Thank you, internet!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m a longtime connoisseur of Miss Little Debbie’s creations. But I have no clue why these altars (located in Collegedale, Tennessee) were erected in the first place. Nevertheless, I’d rank them amongst the Mona Lisa and Sistine Chapel.
6. Vacation Tees… w/o the trip
When did everyone I follow on Instagram get rich enough to fund a weeks-long excursion to Europe?!
I cannot relate — but I will be cosplaying “jet setter” with these Paris, Manchester, and Barcelona Vacation Tees, available for $35 at Urban Outfitters. And if anyone asks, I purchased them abroad!
7. Joe Jonas
Joe Jonas — of Jonas Brothers and “Boys” by Charli XCX music-video fame — just dropped “Work It Out,” his first solo single in 10 years.
Honestly, I can’t wait to give it a listen… you know, if/when I’m done staring at his accompanying shirtless photoshoot.
8. The 20th anniversary of Autobiography by Ashlee Simpson
This week, Ashlee Simpson‘s seminal debut album Autobiography turns 20. Feel old yet?
Back in the day, the punkier Simpson sister was constantly scrutinized while trying to distance herself from the fam, star in her own MTV show, and live down that performance on SNL. But after two decades, I think it’s time we admit that this album is not only a smash, but an artifact of the pre-TikTok, TRL-centric, Y2K pop scene we’ll never get back.
Few songs can reach across the aisle — from straight guys to drag queens — like “Pieces of Me.” Thankfully, Simpson commemorated the anniversary by dropping an expanded edition. And she seemingly understands its value to the LGBTQ+ community; she’s throwing an album celebration in WeHo this weekend, featuring international Drag Race alum Tayce and Cara Melle.
9. House of Love Cocktails & Mocktails
If you’ve ever watched an episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race, there’s a 110% chance you’ve seen a shameless advert for House of Love, a.k.a. RuPaul’s ultra-gay canned cocktail brand. As an avid lover of libations and supporting LGBTQ+ business, I was intrigued.
After trying House of Love for myself (in a dive bar, not the werk room, unfortunately), I understand why Ru is always touting it — these bad boys are gooood! Their cocktail collection (starting at $15.99) is a rainbow of flavors, including a Passionfruit Margarita, Vodka Soda Citrus, Strawberry Daiquiri, and Tangerine Margarita, with an earth-shattering 12% ABV. Plus their mocktails — Ginger Mule and Totally Tropical, available in 4-packs for $13.99 — are equally delectable.
10. The viral “Apple” dance on TikTok
I always prided myself on never stooping to the level of doing a TikTok dance, but I couldn’t resist learning the flirty lil’ choreography to “Apple” by Charli XCX. (No, I will not be posting a demonstration video!)
The Brat singer modeled the now-viral moves in a video with Troye Sivan on Instagram, but she probably never imagined the trend would travel as far as Amish country. Interestingly enough, the certified bop was almost left off the track list. “Imagine lol. Anyways it’s [“Apple”‘s] world and we’re just living in it,” she recently told fans. Thank Johnny Appleseed!
Related*
Mother Minogue’s bop, ‘National Anthem’ & frozen espresso martinis: 10 things we’re obsessed with this week
it’s an especially hot week for Yvie Oddly’s memoir, queer western film ‘National Anthem,’ and a new Kylie Minogue bop.
