Omar Ayuso

Omar Ayuso has a complicated relationship with fame, fashion, and his star-making role on Élite.

While the blockbuster Spanish-language Netflix series made him a global thirst trap sensation, after a few years in the public eye, Ayuso fell into a dark place from the weight of being in the limelight.

Now in a new cover story for Vanity Fair Spain, the 26-year-old is opening up about his struggles since walking away from Elite the first time and his journey to becoming prouder than ever for his fan-favorite performance as the main gay on the show.

“There was a huge Calvin Klein billboard on Gran Vía [in Madrid] and I was in bed with depression,” Ayuso said of starring in the brand’s 2021 Pride campaign. “I never saw it.”

Ayuso’s mental health had him thinking he wanted to quit acting, but he soon realized it was less about his career and more to do with the emotional baggage many of us feel growing up in a homophobic world.

“The source of my problems was being an actor, so I didn’t want to be an actor, because up until that moment for me being an actor had meant chaos in my personal life. But I discovered that it wasn’t the profession, it was that I wasn’t well,” he told the outlet.

“There is a story, of course, that comes from childhood, from family, from being a gay boy in a society that is still heteronormative, so there is a constant struggle there. Fame triggers everything, but the origin is not fame.”

After seeing a therapist, Ayuso began to see his outlook change and now is in a much better place.

“Before I didn’t enjoy myself, I was always tense, always rigid, now I have a great time,” he shared.

It was while questioning his acting career that Ayuso exited Elite at the end of season 5 as if he was leaving a toxic relationship.

However, he later found that reprising his role of Omar Sanaa on the series for the show’s final two seasons helped him fully heal.

“It’s very cold out there and Élite is a place where you work very well, where they have always looked after me a lot and where they pay me very well, because I was coming from a period of being idle, of not working, of a depressive process and I needed a place where I could return little by little, where I felt safe and protected,” Ayuso said. “It was a return home.” 

He now has more reverie than ever for his work over seven seasons of the YA telenovela. “I am an Élite boy and now I can say it proudly.”

And while he’s reconciled his feelings about fame and acting, Ayuso still finds being considered cool or a fashion It-boy comes with its own set of insecurities.

“Fashion interests me a lot, but it’s a world that I don’t get too wrapped up in, I have to tell you. I find it very toxic. You stay in a luxury hotel and then you go back to your apartment in Embajadores [hip section of Madrid] to pay bills,” he recounted. “Now you’re cool, now you’re not cool anymore. But who decides what’s cool and what’s not?”

No stranger to attending runway shows and appearing in stylish editorial photo shoots, Ayuso admitted it can warp your sense of self.

“You’re still the same person the year you’re cool and the year you’re not cool, but suddenly you’re not cool anymore and then that makes you question your identity and you have an identity and self-esteem crisis.”

With Elite now in his rear-view mirror, Ayuso is gearing up for his role in the upcoming series Yo, Adicto.

The series is based on the autobiographical book by Spanish filmmaker Javier Giner, who directed the series and is a longtime friend of Ayuso.

The story centers on addiction and Ayuso plays a patient at a rehab facility. The dramatic role features very intense scenes that will show Ayuso in a new light, according to Giner.

“I have always thought that Omar has much more to offer as an actor than we know,” Giner told Vanity Fair. “I hope that Yo, Adicto will put Omar in his rightful place as an actor, because he is capable of doing a monologue with just his gaze.”

Yo, Adicto will premiere at the San Sebastian Film Festival next month and is set to stream on Disney+ in Spain. It’s unclear when or where US audiences will be able to see it, but we’ll keep you posted.

Related*

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Once Monthly Annually

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated