This season of Fire Island might be the messiest one yet… and it’s only July 5!
The drama started when one aspiring circuit gay tried to drag his friend on Twitter, only to experience a barrage of backlash. Over the long weekend, Troy Maez shared a screenshot of a message from one of his housemates, who admonished him for entering his room in the late-night hours and eating a chicken tender.
“Three paragraphs to yell at me over one singular chicken finger at 6am,” Maez tweeted, along with multiple crying laughing emojis.
Maez seemingly thought that Gay Twitter™ would back him up, and agree that he did nothing wrong. Every twink for himself, right?
But as it turns out, he was (mostly) wrong.
Gay Twitter™ expressed sympathy for the now-tenderless housemate, who was left without his post-club snack.
Why are u going in ur room mates room and taking their food is the real question???
— Thomas🎭 (@edmthomas) July 3, 2023
Troy you need to go on live and do an apology rn
— Corey Jacob (@coreytimes) July 3, 2023
While this episode may be a party foul in any setting, it was viewed as especially serious on Fire Island, where there are no late-night food options. In fact, there are few food options in general. For more than 70 years, there’s only been one grocery store in the Pines!
Chicken tendies are a valuable (and expensive) commodity.
It also is clearly on fire island…food from canteen is pricey. And it’s one of like two options to buy food and not open all the time.
— Princess Leia of Manhattan ✨ (@zaddyvince) July 2, 2023
Now, that’s not to say Maez was entirely on an island (pun intended). Some members of Gay Twitter™ questioned why somebody would want old tenders in the first place.
I was really praying they were in a mini fridge 🙏🏻
— Matt (the gay one) 🏳️🌈 (@MattLumyums) July 3, 2023
i choose to believe there’s a mini fridge
— tyler oakley 👹 (@tyleroakley) July 3, 2023
As the weekend progressed, something unforeseen happened: the narrative turned. Meaz kept chronicling his adventures, and Gay Twitter started to rally around the vilified visitor.
Meaz didn’t back down, either. We love an anti-hero!
fire island is about Community i stand with you 100%
— hari nef (@harinef) July 3, 2023
I’m living for this 😂
— Michael Hill (@MichaelHill0528) July 3, 2023
As Fourth of July weekend came to an end, and Meaz escaped Demon Twink-level infamy, some new Fire Island villains emerged just in time.
The girls were… brawling!
The mayhem took place outside of Canteen. No word on whether any stolen tenders were involved.
The battle over chicken fingers continues
— Gideon (@ghod) July 5, 2023
I am obsessed with everything coming out of Fire Island and the chicken tenders and I’ve never even been
— Aaron B (@aceoforder) July 5, 2023
Though getting into a fistfight outside of Canteen is definitely toxic, we must admit the bystanders’ commentary is hilarious.
“Stahhp! Stahhp!,” screamed one on-looker.
Unsurprisingly, he did not succeed in breaking up the scuffle. Good effort, though!
Get awwwwwffuhhhhhh !
— Ryan, of the Sharingan (@RyRapture) July 5, 2023
Sounded like kandi muse lmao
— 9th Ave Chopped Cheese (@summerallyr) July 5, 2023
The Fourth of July is known for fireworks, but the Pines took the chaos to a new level last weekend. We can’t wait to see what the rest of this season has in store.
Bromancer7
People noting the price of the tenders, but if you’re spending a weekend or longer on Fire Island during the summer you ain’t poor. They’re all city queens, they should be used to paying $22 for fast food.
RickyW
…and this was worth an article?
Rambeaux
Of course!
Do you mean that you weren’t breathless over this controversy?
I may lose some sleep tonight over it.
Sister Bertha Bedderthanyu
Does anyone know if Lady Bunny is still alive? She used to be a summertime staple for Fire Island parties but now seems to have vanished off the face of the earth.