With some threesomes, three’s not company—three’s a crowd.
Reddit users shared their ménage-à-trois experiences in a recent r/askgaybros thread… and the biggest takeaway is that threesomes aren’t always as hot as they seem.
Of course, some guys have lucked out. One Reddit user said threesomes are “like the scene in Challengers—equal parts erotic, awkward, and fun.”
How about we take this to the next level?
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Redditors report you’ll have good luck with threesomes, too, if you and your two sex partners are all committed to everyone’s pleasure—or, at least, if you’re the guest star. “The best encounters are always with couples because they already have a chemistry between themselves [and you] get all the attention,” one person wrote. “The best sex I ever had was a three-way with a Brazilian muscle bear couple, when I got DPed and treated like an absolute slut in bed and like a good boy after, as one of them cooked for us while the other mixed drinks. Then we watched a film, and I spent the night spooning and cuddling with them both. I felt so special.” Many others shared disappointing experiences, however, and if your bed hasn’t been as populous as you’ve wanted, perhaps their tales will show you how little you’ve been missing: “This was a couple who lived, like, 500 meters away, who I visited quite a few times. I was there to please one person, it seemed. Many rules, none of my needs were heard, always the same procedure, like I had to do the things his partner wouldn’t/couldn’t do.” “I’m not a fan of threesomes. I had two, and while they were fun, it never felt even. Had one with two exes—we had all dated each other at some point—and all it did was made me realize I had more of a connection with my second ex over the first. But the first had more of a connection with me over the other guy. It was just noticeable and awkward. The second one was with a couple, and I was pretty much just the third wheel. But you could tell they discussed this before, because one wanted to be in control and it felt too choreographed, like they had set up ground rules and scenarios but didn’t tell me. I was just there as a toy, which is the only part that made it fun, but it just didn’t seem natural.”
“It was uninteresting. The guys were fine, but it seemed like all that happened was two guys worked on me at once. Not the thrill I thought it might be. I prefer one-on-one.” “I wasn’t the one being left out. I didn’t like it because of that.” “I have never had a good one. It’s better to meet a bunch of people and be able to break off with one dude than to have to manage the experience of multiple people that I might not even be attracted to. It’s like being served a delicious steak but also being served uncooked frozen vegetables on the same plate and being expected to eat it all.” They had six threesomes in a 72 hour period. “I did it once, and I was not really into it, nor was another one of the guys. I think it was the third guy’s fantasy, but it just wasn’t working out.” “For me, it was horrible. I’m demisexual, but I did not know when I had the experience. It left me traumatized. My partner seemed to enjoy it, though. We dated a stranger, and he seemed to enjoy it, too. I guess it’s not for everyone. If you like casual sex, you are probably going to enjoy it. Just make sure to protect yourself and to not do anything you don’t want to do. If you are demisexual, or you simply don’t enjoy casual sex but for some reason you want to experience a threesome, some advice I can give is, first meet the person or persons. Go for a drink, go to a restaurant, or play video games. You should have an emotional bond with them when the experience takes place. If you are not sure about doing it, don’t do it.” “I tried it a few times and always—and I mean always—someone will feel like they are left out. I don’t plan to do it ever again.” “Recently I had one where they both came within, like, 15 minutes of me showing up and then didn’t even try to make me come at all afterward. I left so bitter.” “The worst was when a couple started arguing with each other. And we hadn’t even undressed yet.” Responses have been edited for grammar, brevity, and readability.
Related*
This couple’s addiction to nonstop threesomes nearly ended their relationship
JClark
Yeah, sometimes a three-way works, and sometimes it doesn’t. But if you’re a couple and want to stay a couple, three-ways can be difficult to manage because feelings get in the way — jealousy, self-esteem, trust issues are all pushed to the forefront. I met my third long-term partner in a three-way with my second long-term partner. That relationship also ended after lots of three-ways. If you’re the third in a three-way with a couple, you can walk away from the situation if it’s not good. The couple can’t and have to deal with any fallout. I’m the last person in the world to be judgmental of couples involved in three-ways, but I do know that it’s often a high-wire balancing act to participate in three-ways and sustain a healthy relationship. For me, it was too much work, and I wouldn’t want to be in that situation again.
[email protected]
Me personally think threesomes are fun and exciting, I would never turn one down,even if it did cause problems with partners/couples or even individuals.
Every person has the right to make their own mind up. !!! Even in a couple !!!
RIGay
I have been in a closed, monogamous relationship for 26 years. When we first met, we thought “and extra buddy in bed would be great!”; but it never jelled. It was awkward and really drove the point home that it was not for us.
We’ve met some “thruples”, and honestly, observing the social dynamics were just… sad.
Chrisk
All comes down to trust, having good self esteem, and not being the jealous type.
williamdaw
My husband I were together for almost 25 years, closed and monogamous. Lost him about 18 months ago to cancer. We discussed bring a third in a couple times, but never did it. My husband ended up being the one who said he couldn’t do it. Truth be told, I would have been the true jealous one in the end. I loved him too much and the thought of him with another man would have just set me off in a fit of rage…