J.D. Vance isn’t coy about his dream to be Trump’s #2. The Ohio senator is practically begging for the (dis)honor!

We haven’t seen someone this thirsty to be indoctrinated into MAGA World since Kristi Noem. Quick, someone check to see if Vance owns any dogs…

Over the next week, Fox & Friends is hosting a special interview series with three of Trump’s rumored top VP picks: Vance, Tim Scott and North Dakota governor Doug Burgum. All of the candidates’ partners will join them, including Scott’s fiancee Mindy Noce. The South Carolina senator hard-launched their relationship right when he abandoned his own White House ambitions and endorsed Trump.

In turn, the disgraced ex-president expressed his congratulations… hah, we’re just kidding! He implied the celibate senator is gay.

Vance’s wife, Usha, came across well in the couple’s Fox News sit-down. Her husband, meanwhile, couldn’t grovel enough. The Hillbilly Elegy author said it would be upsetting to see Trump select somebody else.

“I’m a human, right?” he said. “So when you know this thing is a possibility, if it doesn’t happen, there is certainly going to be a little bit of disappointment.”

It will be interesting to see how Vance’s public acquiescence plays with America’s most notorious convicted felon. While Trump obsesses over loyalty, he doesn’t always appreciate obvious brown-nosing.

But perhaps Vance is overcompensating. He was a vociferous Trump critic during his 2016 campaign, wondering to a friend whether Trump is a “cynical a-hole” like Richard Nixon or “America’s Hitler.”

Vance labeled himself a “Never Trump Guy” in a 2016 interview with Charlie Rose, and called the Republican nominee “noxious.” There was also a tweet from October 2016, in which Vance derided Trump as an “idiot.”

Not very nice!

Desperate for MAGA adulation, Vance quickly changed his tune when running for Senate in 2022. Since arriving to Washington in January 2023, the Yale Law grad and former venture capitalist has positioned himself as one of Trump’s most loyal lapdogs.

In his interview with Fox News, Vance said Trump’s outstanding performance in the Oval Office turned him into a supporter (right)…

“Trump was just a very, very good president,” he said, while tripping over his words. “When you look at something and you say, ‘Look, this guy was successful.’ He brought freedom, he brought a ton of prosperity to our country, peace on the world stage. .. I just think the results were so good.”

Along with worshipping Trump, Vance uses his position to oppose the LGBTQ+ community. An opponent of the Respect for Marriage Act, which codified protections for same-sex and interracial marriage, the gratuitous pol derided the effort as a “bizarre distraction.”

Vance, of course, is an interracial marriage himself (Usha is Indian). In other words, he hates gay people sooo much, he refused to protect his marriage if it meant also protecting theirs.

His self-sabotaging actions belong on the Mount Rushmore of self-owns…

Related*

Not content with only opposing rights to gay people, Vance has also compiled a steadfast anti-trans voting record. Earlier this month, he used the 80th anniversary of D-Day to ridicule the concept of gender-affirming care.

Honoring World War II vets who fought against the Nazis by pushing bigotry. Interesting choice…

Since May, Vance has made almost two dozen media appearances as a Trump surrogate, and appeared at his criminal trial. Other VP hopefuls, such as Burgum and Marco Rubio, made the trek down to New York, too.

All three lickspittles are also expected at Thursday night’s debate in Atlanta. Forever a cheesy showman, Trump may make his selection right there.

J.D. Vance… prepare to be disappointed!

Related*

Don't forget to share:

Help make sure LGBTQ+ stories are being told...

We can't rely on mainstream media to tell our stories. That's why we don't lock Queerty articles behind a paywall. Will you support our mission with a contribution today?

Once Monthly Annually

Cancel anytime · Proudly LGBTQ+ owned and operated