When audiences first met Kristian Nairn on HBO’s smash-hit fantasy drama Game Of Thrones, he only had one word from them: Hodor!
Now he’s finally able to share his side of the story—in as many words as he wants—thanks to his new memoir, Beyond The Throne: Epic Journeys, Enduring Friendships, And Surprising Tales, available everywhere on September 22.
One one hand, the book is sure to keep GOT fans fed while they wait for the arrival of spinoff series A Knight Of The Seven Kingdoms in 2025, offering up Nairn’s firsthand account of life on set. But it also doubles as a personal story of self-acceptance, as the actor offers up his own journey—and Hodor’s—as a beacon of hope for anyone who has ever felt like an outsider.
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Born and raised in Northern Ireland, Nairn never imagined the fantastical world of Westeros would become such a crucial part of his life. Before he was cast as Hodor—his first ever acting role—he was a DJ, regularly spinning as the resident performer at the Belfast gay nightclub, the Kremlin.
Though he had already been out in his personal and social life, Nairn suddenly found himself wrapped up in a whole new level of fame as GOT became a worldwide cultural phenomenon, and he realized how impactful it could be for him to, essentially, come out again.
“I’ve never hidden my sexuality from anyone, my whole life in fact, and I’ve been waiting for someone to ask about it in an interview,” he told GOT fan site Winter Is Coming back in 2014. “[My sexuality is] a very small part of who I am on the whole, but nonetheless, in this day and age, it’s important to stand up and be counted.”
Since his GOT days, Nairn has continued DJing all over the world, known for his super-popular themed “Rave Of Thrones.” He also played the fan-favorite Wee John Feeney on the beloved, queer-inclusive HBO pirate comedy Our Flag Means Death—a character whose secret passion for drag was inspired by Nairn’s own drag persona, Revvlon.
Needless to say, Kristian Nairn has plenty more story to tell. Ahead of Beyond The Throne‘s publish date, we invited the actor & DJ to be the latest guest in our rapid-fire Q&A series, Dishin’ It. In our conversation, he opens up about the “gay mentors” who helped him find community, the lifelong friendships he made on the GOT set, and what sea-faring adventures he had hoped were next for Wee John Feeney.
Is there a piece of media—whether a movie, TV series, book, album, theater, video game, etc…—that has played an important role in your understanding of queerness and the queer community? Why does it stand out to you?
The movie Philadelphia was a huge event in my young gay life. I remember seeing the portrayal of a gay relationship on screen in a loving and positive and complicated way, when before it had pretty much been portrayed as stereotypes and caricature. It also got people talking about the subject in many different ways, and with people who might not ever have spoken on the issues. Important.
Your new memoir, Beyond The Throne, takes fans behind the scenes of Game Of Thrones from your perspective, but also tells your story of finding self-confidence and stepping into your power. Was there a section or chapter of the book that felt most cathartic for you to write? Why was it important for you to share that story with the world?
It was all cathartic honestly. Some parts more than others. I really wanted to show that you can hang onto yourself, despite a storm thundering around you, and in fact, the more you can be yourself, the easier it will be to find your path.
We have to imagine you get recognized by Thrones fans often—and we’re sure they love shouting “Hodor!” at you—so we’re curious: What’s one of the strangest or funniest fan interactions you’ve ever had?
I do. When things were at their peak, I did my shopping at 3am. Definitely heard “Hodor!” floating pointedly from the produce section! The strangest would have to be when I was having some work done to my home. I was sitting on the stairs in just my robe, and the guy’s apprentice was repeatedly taking pics of me, thinking he was subtle. The father noticed and the two had an almighty row in their van!!! I don’t mind having pics with anyone, but that felt a little wrong!
What would you say was one of your most unexpected friendships to come out of your experiences filming Game Of Thrones? Do you have any specific fond memories of working with them on set?
Honestly George [R.R. Martin] himself. I’ve loved him and his lovely wife Parris, since the start. He had almost god-like clout amongst us, and I’m not sure why I’ve been lucky enough to get his attention and friendship, but I’m sure glad I did.
Where’s one of the first spaces you can remember that made you feel a part of a queer community?
When I had just come out, I decided I wanted to help others going through the same thing, so I joined the local gay switchboard charity and worked on the phones. There I met two older gentlemen, who if anyone asked, I would cite as my gay “mentors.” It was there I really first felt a part of the community.
We’re also huge fans of Our Flag Means Death and we’re sad it came to an end after Season 2. If Wee John Feeney was the star of his own spin-off series, what would you like to see happen next for him?
For the record, we are all sad too. Wee John is an interesting chap, full of contradictions. I would have liked to have seen a little romance for him. I think he’s a little lonely out there at sea.
You’re also a renowned DJ who performs all over the world. So what we want to know is: What do you like to listen to in your free time, or perhaps when you’re on the road to the next gig? Also: Did you have any specific music you liked to listen to to pump you up while on the set of Thrones?
Weirdly, for acting and DJ sets, I don’t really use music to pump me up… I’m a fan of quiet moments. I try to sit with myself as often as I can. I think it’s valuable and it’s becoming a lost art. Someone actually asked me in an airport recently: “why aren’t you on your phone or iPad?” It shocked me honestly. I have no problem daydreaming for hours. I love synthwave, and anything with big emotional synths, or metal, and I even love traditional Irish.
Who is a queer or trans artist/performer/creator that you think is doing really cool work right now? Why are they someone we should all be paying attention to?
I feel like my friend and cast mate, Nathan Foad, is a serious serious comedic talent (and I’d hate for him to hear my compliments haha), and an incredibly talented writer. I can’t wait to see his future projects.
Beyond The Throne: Epic Journeys, Enduring Friendships, and Surprising Tales publishes September 24 via Hachette Books and is available now for pre-order. Both Game Of Thrones and Our Flag Means Death are currently streaming via Max.
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