Canadian TikTokker and Instagram influencer Chris Zou is prompting debate with one of his most recent videos. In it, he sets out to talk about “standards,” and how most gay men could enjoy a lot more sexual encounters if they dropped their “standards” a little.
He holds up glory holes as an example of an easy way to get a blow job… if you don’t particularly care who’s providing it, that is.
“Straight people often have this assumption that gay men have an easier time getting laid. And it’s true. It’s 100% true. But I would even argue that straight people underestimate how easy it is for us to get laid.”
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“Like, if I wanted to get my schlong wet right now at this very moment, all I’d have to do is hop on to Grindr and message a glory hole that’s like ten minutes away from me. And he would just get me off without even seeing my face. I don’t even have to send him a single picture of me. Which is honestly kind of a shame because I would like for him to know that he is getting to taste a famous person.”
Fame, of course, is relative. Zou has 600K followers on his main TikTok account, where he tends to post what appear to be off-the-cuff observations on life. He has another account (@storiesofgaycz) that is primarily gay musings.
Zou continues to talk about glory holes and the attitude some men have toward them.
“Some guys get worried that if they put their thing through the hole then the guy on the other side might chop it off. Why would he do that?”
Good question!
“You do realize that people who host glory holes really, really love schlongs? That’s why they’re hosting them. If anything, they’re probably one of the last people to want to chop it off. All you’re really going to get is some of the most incredible head in your entire life.”
Point taken!
“If you’re going to drop your standards anyway, why not start now?”
Zou then goes on to say straight men would love to make use of glory holes if women created them.
“You do realize straight me would willingly chop off both their balls for women to host glory holes throughout the city, right?”
“Thankfully, women have something called self-respect, or else society would just collapse. Cos men would just be visiting glory holes at any chance they get. So whenever you hear gay men on here complain about how they can’t find anyone and that no one wants them, the problem is not a lack of supply. The problem is that they have standards.”
“And look, I’m all for ‘my body, my choice’, and so if you choose to have standards for your body then I’m all for it. I support you 100% but I’m also going to give you a dose of reality. Standards make sense when you have something to offer that everyone wants. If you’re young, beautiful, muscular, uncut, then people want you and so you have the power to choose.”
He continued, “But I promise you there will come a time in your life when you will no longer have that power. Where you’re no longer the one choosing. You’re the one sitting there waiting to be chosen.”
“You see, I’m about to turn 37 and so all of my friends are in their late 30s, early 40s, late 40s, some are even hitting their 50s. And so we’re kind of all going through a transitionary phase … Men are not looking at us the way they used to look at us. And so we have to sort of change up our strategy because you still have a sex drive.”
“And so my philosophy is if you’re going to drop your standards anyway, why not start now? You know, it’s 2024. It’s all about inclusivity. Why not give everyone a try? You never know what you’re going to get. Sometimes that hideous ogre is really good in bed. Just turn off the lights. Just imagine it’s someone else, like you do with your husband.”
Hand soap journey
Among his followers, some gay thirtysomethings said they found Zou’s words relatable. Other men said they were in their 40s and getting more sex than ever, mainly from younger guys wanting daddy figures.
Several people (mainly women) expressed shock to hear about the very concept of glory holes or that some men “host” them in their homes (“Where are glory holes? Like are they in someone’s house or like a bathroom? Just curious,” said one person).
Zou posts a video on a near-daily basis, offering his thoughts and philosophies on a wide range of topics. A video he posted recently about his journey to find the best brand of hand soap racked up over 6 million views and 18K comments.
@storiesofcz SOFTSOAP IS OK #soap ♬ original sound – Chris Zou
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