Your vibe not only attracts your tribe; it also chooses your toxic relationship. Oop!
According to a new study by Personality and Individual Differences, people with “dark personalities” often seek relationships with partners who exhibit the same traits.
As researchers learned, these attributes are typically present in both parties early in relationships, seemingly revealing that they were part of the attraction.
How about we take this to the next level?
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So, does this mean we owe “boyfriend twins” an apology?
In this case, “dark personalities” refer to those who show signs of the “dark triad” of personality traits: Machiavellianism, narcissism, and psychopathy.
Typically, these characteristics are seen as hindrances to relationships, manifesting through gaslighting, manipulation, lack of empathy, and struggle with long-term commitment.
Nevertheless, researchers noticed that when it came to these traits, “partner resemblance was stronger than would be expected by chance,” suggesting that they are “likely choosing partners who share these tendencies.”
Perhaps birds of a feather do flock together.
To conduct the investigation, researchers gave 104 UK and 99 Fuji couples — who had been together for varying amounts of time, from one month to nearly 60 years — a survey to determine any “dark triad” attributes.
The study aimed to better understand how personality traits—rather than characteristics like age, education, and shared interests—factor into “assortative mating,” a.k.a. the idea that we shack up with people with whom we share similarities.
That said, these relationships are by no means doomed.
In fact, a study by the Journal of Personality found that people with dark personality traits (especially narcissism and psychopathy) “feel more satisfied” in relationships “with partners who exhibit similar dark traits.”
Happy endings come in all shapes and sizes!
Although the results may shed some light on whom we unwittingly attract, the investigation wasn’t without its short sights.
Namely, that only heterosexual couples participated. (Boo!)
It would be easy to shift all the toxicity onto the straights — hello, Donald and Melania!
But we’ve got a sneaky feeling there would be similar findings in the LGBTQ+ community.
Case-in-point: a recent post on Twitter X went viral after asking users, “What’s the worst ship of all time?”
In addition to the hetero staples — i.e. Renesmee and Jacob in Twilight (WTF!) — the gays responded in droves with a handful of LGBTQ+ couples from TV and film that were toxic, incompatible, or controversial.
Honestly, researchers should just examine these queer relationships in their next study.
Judging by the looks of it, we’re pretty sure the science is there!
Check out some of the funniest responses to the worst LGBTQ+ ships on social media below.
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